16 years in the waiting, the review that you've all been waiting for. This is the film that invented the word 'meta'. It's a film within a film, as the film is being pitched throughout the film and created on the fly, and who'd of thought the future would be made by the Spice girls. Obviously anyone who grew up in the 90's (like myself) wont be shocked that the Spice girls created the future of pop culture, but the filthy youngsters out there (who think the Spice girls are some cheese band because they're too young to appreciate fine pop) probably wouldn't expect this.
So, what's it about? Basically, it's the simplest plot ever as they've got to get to the Royal Albert Hall to perform a live gig. I'm going to stop at this moment to say I watched it fairly drunk (and I'm writing it straight after so you can blame grammatical errors on alcohol) which made it far better than it really is. We see the girls struggling to live up to the celebrity status they've got themselves in to an living in a double decker Union flag bus when all they want to do is get six coffee's for £1.50! and chips (BTW, there's a sixth spice girl who never made it in the band but her pregnancy throughout the film is a major plot point (but that's who the sixth coffee was for)). It certainly plays up to some of the characters as sporty is constantly talking about football and on a training bike while posh is always going on about clothes but they have a more tough time making character jokes about the others (what defines being a baby though really asides from screaming).
It's also a film filled with Britishisms (is that a word (this spell check doesn't think so)) such as a James Bond style introduction and plenty of British actors. For example Richard E Grant channels his inside Withnail (I had so hoped he was I so I could say 'Richard E grant channelled his inner I' so I could have pulled it off all cocky and most people wouldn't have got it and I'd have looked well cool but alas the Doctor ruined it) as he plays the Spice girls stressed out manager who has to deal with all the stress of celebrity while the girls go on speedboats and drown their fans and he's not helped by a documentary crew headed up by Alan Cummings trying to get something interested and his own boss, Roger Moore (to continue to the Britishness) who does such things as stroll around in a dressing gown and feed a pig with a baby's bottle. We also see Meatloaf play the Girls bus driver and make the best joke not just in this film, but perhaps all films (I don't want to spoil it as you should watch it yourself for that.
.jpg)
Of course, all this Spice girls talk brings up the ultimate question of the 90's, what's the order of the Spice girls hottest? Ask most boys in the 90's and they'd put ginger top and sporty bottom with a mixed order in between but now I'm not so sure. I have to give props to posh in this film, before she became skinny as a rake she had a lot going for her (come on becks, sue me, my resounding memory of you will always be of seeing Julian Joachim scoring a 25 yarder against you lot) and when Sport wasn't in all the sports gear (as was her gimmick) she was pretty fine looking (if you can get past the accent). Not to take anything away from baby or scary either, but then they're not going to put a girl band of meh lookers together anyway.
Back to the film. After going on an Italian chat show they have to get some dancing lessons so they thaw out Michael Barrymore as some kind of army general dance instructor to teach the girls how to march not sure what this has to do with dancing). It should be pointed out at this point that while some Americans are trying to make a film out of the girls (which becomes the running eta part of the film) an evil Aussie paper editor is trying to make the girls look terrible by employing Richard O'Brien to catch them at their worse moments including crawling crawling out of the toilet at Micheal Barrymore's dance internment camp and taking pictures of the walls (what would mumsy say?).
After this they have a Falling out with Clifford (Withnail (who crawls into the arms of Claire Ruchbrook (whoever she is (though I do recognise her from somewhere)))) they go on the run to have chips and flashbacks (obviously inspiring Family Guy in the process), the attempted drowning of competition winners and going clubbing. That's when the not sixth member goes in to labour (though it has to be questioned what 1 week overdue mother would go in to a club) very nearly making them late for the gig the whole film is based on building towards and nearly giving Daphne's brother a heart attack. Of course they make it and tear the house down, Richard O'Brien is foiled and the film is set to be made and Dr. Jack Steward, the film producers and James Bond go crazy. This sets up the post credits sequence (take that Marvel) that goes crazy meta with Richard O'Brien and Richard E Grant questioning the film they are going to be in while Mel C references that they've already made the film (this stuff is crazy).
Other notes in this film are that Scary doesn't get Chess, Elvis Costello tops his Frasier appearance and Gerri loves facts.
So a final score then. If you're sober probably about 3/10. If however you've had a few drinks, grew up in the 90's and are in the mood, 8/10!
Spice up your life (I bought it back)!
No comments:
Post a Comment